Tuesday, May 24, 2016

Fat Tuesdays : Saggy Boobs

***Warning*** There are BOOBS in this post. Just sayin'. Nakedness! Watch out!

Not too long ago, I came across a post in a Facebook group that supported women who don't want to wear bras. In this post were some pretty outlandish ideas about how not wearing a bra actually makes your breasts PERKIER. It was nonsense, honestly. However, after I did some research, I realized that lots and lots and lots of people actually perpetuate this nonsense as well as some other such nonsense. So let me add my voice to the din regarding bras and saggy boobs!

First, we have to start at the beginning, which is with the very idea of saggy boobs being a solvable medical condition. I know, it's crazy right? Here's a picture of your medical issue...unless you have "normal" breasts. I certainly don't!


That's the start of the problem; the idea that "saggy breasts" is a medical condition. It's not. Boobs come in all shapes and sizes and that "normal" breast is actually just a B cup or smaller. The problem is, for whatever reason, we've evolved into a society that says that "normal" is small and perky and "abnormal" is large and saggy. People will try to sell you on fixing your breasts when they don't need fixed.

If you look around the interwebs at images of breasts, they all show this "normal" breast, which could make someone like me feel abnormal. (Luckily, I don't feel that way.)

This idea that saggy boobs are a medical condition means that there has to be reasons for your saggy boobs. It's not ok to say, "Big boobs sag because gravity." Instead, they have to come up with issues like smoking and BMI (so unscientific) and babies create this problem. That's not true. Small boobs sag less because gravity. There is less weight to them, so the supportive structures in boobs, which is really only the skin, can hold up their small weight. Breast feeding can make them less perky, that's true. The structure of boobs change when they are used for breast feeding. Age isn't really going to make tiny boobs super saggy because there isn't enough in them to make them sag over time.

Normal boobs are different!

The post I read focused on how not wearing a bra can make your boobs perkier, which isn't true. But if you look around the internet, this is a hot topic. People think that wearing a bra makes your Cooper's ligaments less tight and therefore, causes sagging and that not wearing a bra forces your ligaments to work and help keep your breasts perky. This misunderstands exactly what ligaments do.

Ligaments are not muscles. Ligaments cannot be flexed or stretched or "worked out". They are connective tissue. They crisscross areas to support and to stabilize. They don't have tone and they have a limited blood supply, because they are meant to stay in place. Just do their job. They don't regenerate well (or at all) because of the limited blood supply. What I'm saying is, you can't have lazy tendons that don't do their jobs because their only job is to grow into place and be there, stabilizing shit. They can't change over time, because they don't have a blood supply that allows them too. Nevertheless, this idea that breasts can be improved in some manner, outside of unnatural options, seems to pervade the internet. It's all myths, though.


The truth of the matter is, a bra will make your breasts appear perkier and more full. That's just truth. When you take that bra off, will your boobs magically float in the same space? Absolutely not. Bras are support mechanisms designed to hold up boobs. Underwires work to support larger breasts and to hold them up. Straps help with this as well. A large band, supportive underwire, and large straps are going to hoist your boobs up to that round, perky model that society presents as the ideal. When you take that bra off, you boobs are going to droop slightly. Some women with small breasts wear bras because it appears to give them cleavage, helps their boobs look bigger, and covers the nipples. No one is writing articles about how not wearing a bra makes small boobs larger. Because that shit is nonsense! So is the idea that not wearing a bra makes "saggy" boobs perkier. It doesn't work that way. Anatomy and physics, people.

Do what you want, honestly. I could care less if you have fake boobs, real boobs, super perky boobs, saggy flappy boobs. None of it matters. But don't buy into bullshit that ignores common sense. No amount of smoking is going to significantly alter the shape of your boobs, though extreme weight gain or weight loss will. OBVIOUSLY. No smoker ever had altered hips, but someone who gained a lot of weight or lost a lot of weight did! Genetics? Certainly. Your mom's boobs or your grandma's boobs or your aunt's boobs (or your dad's boobs) are probably going to resemble whatever the hell your boobs might do. I mean, duh. Other than that, size is really the main factor...and saggy boobs are normal, not a medical condition.

So wear a big, padded, supportive bra and look like you have big, perky, full boobs...or don't! Whatever you want to do is fine. Just don't believe that taking off a man-made contraption designed to lift your boobs is going to make your natural biology change. It's not.


  1. I think I know the article you're talking about and I thought what they were saying was so weird. I love this post!

    1. It's just so weird that any of this is a "medical condition". UGH! But also, thanks!